Wednesday, July 30, 2014
Monster #: 346,534,567
What Is It: Just a really, really big monster.
What Does It Want: To wreck cities 'n shit.
Why: Because it can, man.
Your Writing's Getting Really Informal: Yeah? Whaddya gonna do about it?
...Nothing: That's what I thought, ya' dummy.
Monday, July 28, 2014
Monster #: 589,238
What Is It: We're not really sure.
What Does It Want: We're not really sure.
Is It Good Or Bad: We're not really sure.
Why Are You So Bad At Your Job: We're not really suHEY!!!
Friday, July 25, 2014
Monster #: 124,554
What Is It: A monster who delights in others' failures.
What Does It Want: To see everyone embarrass themselves.
Why: Because it has poor self-esteem.
That's Not Right: No it's not.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Monster #: 6,540
What Is It: The hidden face we all hide from the world.
What Does It Want: To reveal itself.
Is It... Bad: Sometimes.
Can I Stop It: Not all the time.
Monday, July 21, 2014
Friday, July 18, 2014
Monster #: 630,492
What Is It: A worm from the planet Ahkturria.
What Does It Want: To eat just about everything it sees.
How Big Is It: About as big as your house.
I Live In A Mansion: Yeah, he's a big son of a gun.
Well, At Least I Don't Leave on Ahkturria: Ahkturria is what they rename Earth in 20 years.
DAMNIT: Agreed. Ahkturria is a bad name.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Monster #: 982,034
What Is It: A very creepy female spirit.
What Does She Want: No idea. I don't like the look she's giving you though.
She's Not Looking At Me, She's Looking At You!: Sorry buddy, she only has eyes for you.
OH NO!!!: Hey, maybe she won't be evil.
Monday, July 14, 2014
Monster #: 45,230
What Is It: A very large sea snake.
What Does It Want: To live it's life peacefully in the ocean.
How Slippery Is He: Very slippery.
How Slippery is "Very Slippery": Extremely slippery.
Friday, July 11, 2014
Monster #: 6,720
What Is It: Just a big, big monster.
What Does It Want: To eat sailors, ships, battleships, all that good stuff.
Why: Because they taste very good to him.
I Don't Think They Taste Very Good: Well, you're not a giant monster now are you?
... No: That's what I thought.
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
Monster #: 93,320
What Is It: A woman with a dark secret.
What's Her Secret: We don't know. It's very dark though.
Does The Secret Involve That Weird Thing Standing Behind: Probably, yeah.
Is It Looking At Me: Probably, yeah.
Monday, July 7, 2014
Monster #: 654,096
What Is It: An icky little creature that lives at the bottom of the beach.
What Does It Want: To bite on your legs.
Wait, Some Weird Bite Marks Appeared On My Leg When I Was At Cancun This Year: Really?
Does That Mean... : I think it does.
Oh God: Yeah, it's pretty freaky.
Am I Going To Die: I dunno, maybe.
MAYBE!!?: I don't know! I just write the entries!
Friday, July 4, 2014
Monster #: 5,240
What Is It: A creature that loves love.
What Does It Want: To help people fall in love.
Why: Because it's the only one of it's kind.
How Tragic: See, this is how it all comes together.
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Monster #: 2,494
What Is It: An unknown alien.
What Does It Want: That's unknown at this time.
Well, What DO We Know About This Alien: Nothing. Except that it's an alien.
God, You're Useless: Yeah, well, you're useless too, buddy!