Wednesday, August 21, 2013

The Rokden


Monster #: 300,397

What Is It: Who knows. He's weird lookin' though.

What Does He Want: To stare at me apparently. STOP LOOKING AT ME!

Is His Head a Skull: Probably! Trying to creep me out!

It's Not All About You, You Know: Shut up.

Monday, August 19, 2013

The Krumms


Monster #: 936,048

What Are They: Some sort of spirits that live just beyond your field of vision.

What Do They Want: Not known at this time.

They're Kinda Creepy Lookin': Yeah.

I Don't Like Creepy Things: Neither do we!

Friday, August 16, 2013

The Goofinians


Monster #: 499,236

What Are They: Goofy little monsters.

What's Their Deals: The orange one is stupid, the red one is energetic and the blue one is sad.

Are They Friends: The best of friends!

Do They Ever Get Anything Accomplished: Nope!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

The Blue Gragnarr


Monster #: 98,456

What Is It: A very big, very hungry monster.

What Does It Want: To eat everything.

Everything: EVERYTHING.

What Happens When It Eats Everything: Then it stops. As does the world.

Monday, August 12, 2013

The Graveyard


Monster #: 8

What Is It: A graveyard. What else?

That's Not Really a Monster: No, but it's where some monsters come from.

Like What: Zombies, ghouls, vampires, stuff like that.

How Come Graveyards Are Spooky? Why Can't There Be a Nice Graveyard: I don't know! Ask someone else!

Friday, August 9, 2013

The Dark One


Monster #: 85,295

What Is It: A nasty creature that lives in the dark.

What Does It Want: Why your soul, what else.

What Does It Want With My Soul: He's a collector.

Oh, Like a Comic Book Collector: Yeah, sort of.

With Souls Instead of Comic Books: Yes.

...Still Don't Like Him: Can't blame ya'.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

The Mordred


Monster #: 900,003

What Is It: A monster disguised as an alien landscape.

What Does It Want: To trap passing spaceships.

What, They Don't Notice The Tunnel Looks Like a Mouth: Look, you've seen "The Empire Strikes Back," right.

Yeah: Same deal.

Oh: Mmhmm.

Isn't That a Movie: Movies can be true too you know!

Monday, August 5, 2013

The Yammering


Monster #: 567,258

What Is It: A big monster that likes to talk and talk and talk...

What Does It Want: To talk and talk and talk...

Why: He can't stop, that's all he can do.

How Sad: His is a life of tragedy indeed.

Friday, August 2, 2013

The Dragnarn


Monster #: 4,533

What Is It: A nasty monster that flies through the night.

What Does It Want: Who knows. Whatever he wants, he's pretty happy about it.

What Am I Looking At, Is It A Dream: Maybe.

Nothing You Say Is Ever Reassuring: I swear, all YOU ever do is complain.