Friday, February 28, 2014
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Monster #: 924,443
What Is It: A really disgusting, weird thing.
What Does It Want: Who knows. He's creepy as hell though.
Yeah: It freaks me out just looking at him.
I Want To Look Away: Me too. BUT I CAN'T!!!
Monday, February 24, 2014
Monster #: 2,405
What Is It: I dunno. A monster.
What Do You Mean You Don't Know: Damnit, we don't know everything about every damn monster!
Why Not: Cuz we're busy!
I Don't Like Your Answers: Well I don't like you!
Friday, February 21, 2014
Monster #: 9,154
What Is It: A very, very goofy monster.
Hey, Wait a Minute: What?
How Come All the Monsters This Week Are Green: I don't know.
You've Been Paid Off By the Green Party, Haven't No: What, no, we haven't... We swear!
My God, You're Jill Stein, Aren't You: No! I, uh! Fine, you found me out!
But Why, Jill Stein: Power. You control one blog, you control them all.
No...: First, this blog, then the world...
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Monster #: 89,265
What Is It: A very hardworking monster.
What Does It Want: To get that report done by 5:00 tonight.
Why: Because it's very important!
I Think This Guy Works in My Dad's Office: He does.
Monday, February 17, 2014
Monster #: 234,246
What Is It: A big, green monster that yodels.
What Does It Want: To yodel, of course, ya big silly.
Why: He's Swiss. That's what Swiss folk do.
This Doesn't Seem Quite Right: Shut up.
Friday, February 14, 2014
Monster #: 98,235
What Is It: A very athletic, angry monster.
Why Is It Angry: He didn't like the way you looked at him.
But I Didn't Look At Him: He thinks you did.
Oh No! Is He Going to Attack Me: Yes.
NOOO!!! I Gotta Run: He's faster than you. Sorry, pal.
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Monster #: 1,056
What Is It: A showman monster.
What Does It Want: He wants to put on The Greatest Show On Earth.
What Is The Greatest Show On Earth: Its destruction.
Not Much of a Show: Well, not for us.
Monday, February 10, 2014
Friday, February 7, 2014
Monster #: 87,205
What Is It: A... dragon's head.
What Does It Want: To find it's body.
How Is It Still Alive: Dragon's can survive decapitation.
What, Really: Yes, really.
How... Annoying: You're telling me, pal!
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Monster #: 87,993
What Is It: A happy-go-lucky monster.
What Does It Want: To say "hi" to everyone he meets.
Why: 'Cuz he believes in being a good, kind person.
He's Not Gonna Last Long: Ha ha no.