Zac-Man

Monster #: 90,529

What Is It: Pac-Man's lesser known brother.

What Does He Want: To be just as good as Pac-Man!

Can He Be As Good as Pac-Man: No, of course not.

Why Not: He's actually super racist.

Oh My: Yeah, it's really terrible.

Larry

Monster #: 6,004

What Is It: A giant talking lizard.

Why Is It Angrily Staring At Us: 'cuz you're staring at him.

Well, I Mean, He's a Giant Lizard: That's no excuse.

You're Right, I'm a Terrible Person: Yes you are.

The Present of Horror!

Who could do such a thing to such an innocent gift?

The Gift of Terror!

Just a reminder folks, a real human being wrapped this present (me!).

Terrifying indeed.

Krej

Monster #: 625

What Is It: A monster that was such a jackass that he got kicked off his home planet.

What, Really: Absolutely, no foolin'.

What Did He Do: Man, he was incredibly passive-aggressive. He also constantly borrowed money and never paid you back.

Oh My God He Sounds Horrible: He was. He also kept talking about how great "Sucker Punch" was. It's not that great, Krej!