Bombson

Monster #: 2,189,450

What Is It: A truly gigantic monster.

What Does It Want: Bombson just wants to make friends.

Really: Yeah, see that weird, bird-thing? He's trying to befriend it.

That's Nice: It is.

Is There Any Horrible Twist To Any of This: Nope. He's just a monster that wants friends.

Aww: Aww.

Bad Thoughts

Monster #: 15

What Are They: The dark, cruel beliefs that lurk in the back of your mind.

What Do They Want: To turn you into a horrible person.

Why: Why not?

How Can I Stop Them: Think twice before you say something.

Krej

Monster #: 625

What Is It: A monster that was such a jackass that he got kicked off his home planet.

What, Really: Absolutely, no foolin'.

What Did He Do: Man, he was incredibly passive-aggressive. He also constantly borrowed money and never paid you back.

Oh My God He Sounds Horrible: He was. He also kept talking about how great "Sucker Punch" was. It's not that great, Krej!