The Giant Octopus

Monster #: 98,349

What Is It: As the name would imply, it is a giant octopus.

What Does It Want: To eat people.

Hey, Wait A Minute, Octopi Don't Have Teeth: Well, this one does, what are you gonna do about, huh?

Well, Obviously, Then This Thing Can't Exist: Oh yeah. You see that photo, you think we Photoshopped this thing?

...Yes? I Mean, It's Not A Photo And It Obviously Used Photoshop Brushes: ...

You Still There: You get out of here right NOW!

Glump

Monster #: 6,429

What Is It: A generally angry and annoyed monster.

Why Is It So Angry: Some monsters are just born angry.

What's It Angry About: Oh you know, the usual stuff: life, people, the environment, the world, the universe.

Does Anything NOT Make Him Angry: Inexplicably he's rather fond of playing bocce ball. We don't know why.

Drulmbd

Monster #: 455,679

What Is It: Some sort of amorphous, nasty looking creature.

What Does It Want: Well, it's got teeth. It probably wants to eat something.

Eat What, Like People: Yeah, probably people.

Why Do All These Monsters Want to Eat People: We're delicious I guess. It's kind of a compliment.

Kind Of: Yeah, kind of.

The Kool Kids

Monster #: 58,234

What Are They: The coolest kids around.

How Cool Are They: They spell "Cool" with a "K." "Kool."

Oh Wow: Yeah.

How Are They Monsters: They eat people.

Oh, Well, There You Go: Yeah.

The Krep

Monster #: 98,718

What Is It: A really big monster with a really big mouth.

What Does It Want: To eat.

What Does It Eat: Whatever it wants.

Including.... People: Oh my yes.

The Fendemp

Monster #: 67,890

What Is It: A monster who just wants to be friends.

What's Happening to Those Two People: Oh, they're sinking in quicksand.

Wait, The Fendemp Lives In Quicksand: Oh yes.

They're Not Going to Be Friends For Long: That's why the Fendemp's life is so tragic.

Eyvind Eel

Monster #: 1,752

What Is It: A very big eel that likes to eat very little fish.

Why: Because it's big enough that no one argues with it.

What Does It Want: To eat, eat and eat.

Why Is It Smiling: Eyvind also likes the taste of people...

Debonare

Monster #: 405

What Is It: A very sophisticated monster.

What Does It Do: Make droll observations and write essays for The New Yorker.

What Does It Want: To write The Great American Novel.

Really: Yep. And also eat people. He likes to eat people.