Blegh

Monster #: 2,980

What Is It: A very, very, very old monster.

What Does It Want: For you whippersnappers to keep it down!

Why Is He Nearly Naked: He just doesn't give a shit anymore.

I Wanna Be Like Him: Me too.

Chek

Monster #: 6,789

What Is It: An ancient bird monster of unknown origin.

What Does It Want: Who knows.

Where Can I Find It: Out in the depths of the Pacific Northwest.

So, Spokane: What, No! Somewhere not as nice.